Just a gut feeling . . . .

I've been talking to my boy a lot lately, and I'm feeling like something's changing. We're changing. I can't explain it, just call it a gut feeling, but something's gonna happen between us. I don't know what yet....but I'm feeling stronger vibes from him. Deeper conversations, longer visits, more email.

I'm so damn ready.

The letter "L"

I was out in blog land last week and was reading Ms. Muse's. I commented, and she in turn gave me a letter to continue this meme . . .here's how it works:

If you want to comment on this entry, I will give you a letter. Write ten words beginning with that letter in your journal, including an explanation of what the word means to you and why, and then pass out letters to those who want to play along.....here's mine....

laughter: It means happiness - food for my soul. Is there anything as fun as laughing w/friends and family or being laughed at by friends and family? Nope!

love: Saying "I love you" is easy for me to those who are special in my life. My babies get my love unconditionally....my family and friends, same thing. What I want though, is to be able to someday again say this to a special man. Yeah, I'm missing that part.

listen: Not a skill, a couple of my friends claim, that I have. But I disagree. It's not that I don't listen, it's just that I'm not always interested. Big difference! My mind wanders when they're talking about the same subject for 10 minutes, ok. I go off somewhere else, but I take in the jest of what's being said. Ask me anything about them....I can answer it. :)

London, England: My new fav city to party. Never in a million years would I have thought I'd claim a foreign country as one of my favorite places on this earth, but I'm telling you....London was deliciously fun. The sightseeing, the underground, the double-deckers and most importantly, the pubs. That was a vacation to remember!

lips: They just turn me on. I see lips on a man first, then see the rest of his face. I think this fetish started in high school when kissing (only kissing) was the thing to do. These girls now are missing the best part of being young.

lakes: Since I haven't always lived by the ocean, the next best thing is having family and friends with lake houses and houseboats. An aunt and uncle of mine started us going to Elephant Butte Lake in the 70's and the same aunt and uncle bought a lake house on Conchas Lake. I love the water, and since fam/friends have all the toys to play, I'm there!

lunch: I go out to lunch just about every day w/my friends from work. At times it's tedious, just trying to figure out where to go, but it's our social time. I'm very close w/some of my girlfriends from work because of this time of day.

lyrics: I love song lyrics. They move me. For the most part, I can't totally enjoy a song until I learn the words. It started when I used to read them from the middle of an album cover. It was like candy, getting a new album and being able to sit and listen (see...I can listen) and read and learn the new lyrics to whatever album was the flavor for the day. Now, I enjoy cd's that provide the words, just as much. I hate it when they don't include the lyrics...

Lauryn Hill: Speaking of lyrics...Ms. Hill is now one of my most favorite rappers ever. Her voice is heaven and her lyrics to her songs are strong and actually have deep meaning. I wish she'd come out w/something new and blow us away....again.

lens: As in eye of the camera. I love pictures and being surrounded by them. I wish I could show you a picture of my office because you'd see about 100 plus pics of my family and friends. I work in a limited secure area, so no cameras allowed...but pictures are, and they make my day.

Sometimes you can't contain the beast within . .

Can't sleep . . .

Did anyone watch the news tonight?? OMG, this alligator was terrorizing a community and a gator catcher caught him. They showed this gator being lifted by a tow truck onto the bed of another truck, with the catcher standing inside the bed of the other truck. Well the mother of a gator was pissed! It arched it's back as it was being hoisted, and slashed it's tail over it's own body and nailed the catchers face. That must have hurt. Just goes to show, you can't contain the beast within.

Which reminds me of my favorite Grey's Anatomy line ever. Izzy was walking out of her bedroom one morning and her roommates were staring at her. They were thinking one thing and she thought they were thinking something totally different so she responded "WHAT??? I fed the beast OK, I'm a horny whore!" I love that show.

I'm a dreamer . . . .

I dream every night. Most times, I remember my dreams and they're bizarre. They're very detailed and I have even laughed so hard in my dreams, that I wake myself up. I very rarely dream scary dreams - and if they are scary (in my mind), it's always about the ocean engulfing me, or that I haven't locked the doors in a house that I never been in or isn't my own. I dream in color, and I can taste food in my dreams. And the best dreams are the kissing dreams - I feel everything.

So why do I bring this up....well lately, I've been daydreaming. Yeah. Like yesterday, I was reading a book during my lunch hour and I had to re-read a paragraph at least 5 times. I could not stop thinking about someone. I hate that this person consumes me. Last night in church, I totally tuned out one of our pastors. I guess, at least, I listened to the other two, but the second one, couldn't tell you one thing he said. I'm thinking this isn't a good trait to have....that of a daydreamer....

5 down, 1 to go . . . .

How can we be so old that now all but one of our babies have graduated from high school? This will happen in two weeks by the way, and then all of the toes you see in my pic will have high school graduates. It feels like we just walked across the line and accepted our diploma. We went in such different directions, my girls and I, but always, always, came together. The family I'm gonna show you is one of my most fav fams ever! I can't even believe that I actually tear up when I think of how special they are to me.

first is fag and her baby girl . . .















this is fags fam . . .















soul mates . . . minus one . . . (she's in Austin)















see why we call her fag . . . :)















dog, her baby and my baby . . .
















Well, another busy weekend. I had a wonderful mother's day because my boys made it special. Plus, I met my sister, brother and dad at the casino and won $500!!!! It was awesome. I've never won that much, but that's mostly because I'm cheap and won't put down bucks the way you should if you really want to win. Anyway, guess my trip to Austin in a couple weeks (to see the last of our babies graduate), is paid for! :)

You've just entered into . . . .

the Twilight Zone . . .(que in music . . . )

My boy thinks I'm scary....his words...."you're scary mom."

I love that I have a sixth sense about my sons. Last night I'm driving home and think of my baby, so I call him. But first let me tell you that he was supposed to take his new/used vehicle to a friend's shop for him to check out our purchase two weekends ago....

Me: "Hey boy - whatcha doing?"
Son: "Just going to dinner w/Bo....what are you doing?"
Me: "What did Dale say about your truck?"
Son: "He hadn't finished looking at it, so he's keeping it overnight."
Me: "Ok, so you won't have a vehicle tomorrow?"
Son: "He'll call me in the morning....Mom, did you know I just got off the phone with him just three minutes before you called?"
Me: "Seriously??"
Son: "Seriously....you're scary Mom....I don't know how you do that."
Me: evil laugh, throws her head back....MUUUUAAAHHHHH.

I've done this thing w/him so many times in our lifetime that I almost think I do scare him (que in music again . . . ), which isn't a bad thing in my books!!! :)

My Vegas Girls. . . .

First, a little background on my friendship w/these women. Some people you just connect w/at work, and I'm not a social seeker of people - I kinda stay in my cubby and work. But when I started working the budget in this groups division several years ago, we've been connected since. Finally, last year, we took a girls trip to Vegas and since then, fuhgetaboutit! We happy hour as much as time and family and friends allow us to. This year, we decided to start something a little different in that we actually are planning social events, (not just happy hour), like going to someone's house for dinner, a movie night, go to a concert, etc. Well Ms. Chris (she's in the brown shirt) picked a concert for us this month and as noted below, we had a blast!

me, good golly (Molly), Chris, Shari & Pat . . .












the only reason we're in bed is because we were tired... :)







We're actually missing two other women. Linda, who is in Boston this week, babysitting the grandbabies, and Patricia, who just party pooped on us.

Anyway, I love hanging w/these girls...they keep me young...or old???

Three hours of sleep just isn't enough . . .

Last night, my Vegas girls and I went to an outdoor concert at Sandia Casino. Very fun, and I'll have pics later, but do you think we could just go home after said concert....NO....these girls don't know how to leave and go home early. Instead, we went inside the casino and listened to another band and decided to dance 'till our feet hurt (and knees). Then, we got invited to go to a private party for one of the singers who played at the outdoor concert. We got up there and almost had to leave immediately since we (my peeps and I) all have clearances, and what they were smoking could easily get us in deep shit. Thankfully they were finished and we ended up entertaining ourselves which is why I love these women. We did finally leave and I took a couple of the girls back to the house we left from, and got all the way home when my cell rang....

Hey Nettie....there's a bag I left in your back seat w/my car keys...I'm sorry!!

No worries, what's another half hour of sleep anyway???

So different, but the same....

My brother invited my sister and me to a dinner party that he and his girlfriend were throwing last Friday night. Of course I went and took dogalogy w/me (or should I say Rudy - short for Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer). I had a great time and I think Dog did, but she's a lot more conservative than I am. What I mean by that is she only had two drinks the whole night (five hour period), compared to my five glasses of wine and maybe four shots of tequila (she drove). What I regretted about that night (or morning) is that I didn't take home some of the leftovers...seriously good food...especially the steak I had!

Anyway, my brother...he's a trip...he's so different. He hangs with a crowd that has money. Big money. The kind of money that buys planes. The kind of money that his friends have access to, to build million dollar homes....that get them acknowledged in New Mexico's Parade of Homes. Now granted, he's doing well himself (he's self employed selling commercial real estate, he owns several properties, is part owner of a club in Vegas and owns several vehicles), but it always amazes me that he can still be such a dork. As much as we don't have anything in common as far as material things, we're so much alike when we party and listen to music. Plus, both he and I love to talk to new people and aren't afraid of engaging someone to find out their story. I'm not as skilled as he is with the gift of gab, but I do enjoy meeting his friends and finding out about them. It's weird that even though he's 10 years younger than I, I still have fun w/him and his friends. I'm pretty spoiled by them actually. Anytime we go anywhere and even at his girlfriends' house, they (his friends) feel the need to take care of me (my food, my drink, etc.). I like it, but more important, I think he's made wise choices with the friends in his circle, just like I have. We've got friends for life and there's nothing more special than that.